Lacuna

Lacuna by Amber D'Amato

When I was drawing this I was running out of ink and my gold leafing pen was dying. R.I.P.

Lacuna
(n.)
A blank space; a missing part.

In college when I was a Creative Writing major with a concentration in poetry, I wrote a poem called, Lacuna Sacrifice. It was about missing my boyfriend who I knew was wrong for me and I was wrong for him. Isn't that odd how we physically get lovesick for someone, like a drug addiction? A year later the movie, Eternal Sunshine for a Spotless Mind, came out. I was moved by the character's desire to erase each other from their minds. It was a beautiful coincidence that the mind erasing business was called, Lacuna. What are the chances? A year after that we started talking again, the ex & I discovered that we both saw that movie and thought about each other while watching it.

I wonder if there is a word for that moment in my life? Sometimes you are haunted by people. It doesn't mean you are right for each other, it just means they left their mark on you, maybe? Or that they are carrying a missing piece of you with them. Perhaps we should view temporary lovers as spring cleaning? They leave you empty inside yet yearning to give love to someone who loves you. So they clean you out of happiness and you replace it with autonomy.